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Just a Spoon Full of Sugar

In his article in the New York Times, “Seeking to Save the Planet, with a Thesaurus”,  John M. Broder quotes “an e-mail account” of a study by a group called EcoAmerica.

Essentially, what his article is saying (and please, don’t take my word for it – read it for yourself) – what I see him saying in his article is that the message that is being sent on the business of global warming needs a sugar coating to make it easier to swallow.

When I was a kid, we used to use tobacco spit or licorice on our lures.  Supposedly it would take the human scent off our artifial bait and make them more palatable for the fish, thus making them easier to swallow – hook, line and sinker.

Uh, yeah.

Well, I don’t know about you, but I’m not swallowing this whole concept put out by the libs.

When I was in “PR School” (where I studied, it was a “subsidiary” of the journalism school), they taught us that the best approach to use in a PR campaign is the truth.

As a case study, they liked to cite the poisoned Tylenol case.


Now there is an interesting concept.

Poison can be construed as anything that kills ya.

Kryptonite is poison to Superman (and, apparently the truth, to the new, “super” man); with Samson it was his lust for Delilah, and we have all heard of politicians who are so drunk with power that power itself became their poison (reference any number of Caesars, Boss Tweed, Adolph Hitler or Sadaam Hussein – a lust for power became their poison).

Well now we have to listen to a bunch of pseudo-scientists tell us that we can take a little sugar with their message and suddenly it will become as crystal-clear as the truth they keep telling us that they are telling (my Grandmother called them “fibs”).

True public relations is just that.

Relating, or relaying, to the public the best, possible representation of the truth (anything that is “re-counted” is a representation of the truth – you had to “be there” to actually see it).

What gets relayed is of extreme importance.

This is why you want your message, as a professional, to be as close to the absolute truth as you can get it (and remember, there are few absolutes – God and Christ are the only two that come to my mind). They “think” they have absolute zero pegged at minus 270° Kelvin, but who knows when they will again break that low point – some say “never”, but then, “never” is another absolute.

Well, I don’t know about you but if it is workable and a decent representation, I won’t need a spoonful of sugar to help make it go down.

Oh, and last time I checked, hook, line and sinkers ain’t medicine and the only thing they are designed to do is get sucker-fish on board the boat.

You want me to swallow something that ultimately leads to my getting hooked and brought aboard your boat when I know for damned sure I am a whole lot better off swimming free in the ocean with all the other little fishes.

I don’t think so.

So here’s an idea for those wishing to re-package the “greening” of America – how about a good, healthy dose of the truth?

Begin by talking about the complexities of our global weather system.

See, I think part of the problem is, well, it is with the messenger himself.

These alarmists want you to think that the world exists in some kind of petri dish or laboratory Erlingmyer flask.

They fail to mention that this “biosphere” is not contained in any of their laboratory experiments.

This “bubble” floats on a black sea of bubbles called the universe.

There are so many forces at work – and they work in different fashions at different times.  Physics, chemistry, astro-physics – man, God made one heck of a vast and complex system.

I think he wanted us to have a toy we would never get tired of trying to solve.  Unlike the Rubik’s cube, every twist in the universe just leads to another turn.

The solution always lies with how we deal with the current conditions – how do we “weather” the storm.

With its complexity, the global system can not be placed in one of their categorical bubbles or petri dishes.

The system changes, adapts, improvises.

It simply sustains itself through adjustment.

Like a machine that recalibrates itself to changing conditions.

The problem, in my estimation, is that the party of change really doesn’t deal that well with change.  What they deal well with is regulation.

The day will probably come when they try and put a governor on the earth itself, to control its spin.

They’ll ulitimately do so much regulating that the top will simply spin out of control.

I remember what I was taught as a child – little boys who play in the fire will pee in the bed.

The liberal’s intellectual answer to a changing global environment is to get a spoonful of sugar, use a new bait, or try obfuscation and re-packaging to make the message easier to swallow.

It is like calling the perfect storm a Summer shower.

Well I don’t know about you, but I see force-feeding as their next move.

I think we’ve learned what they are all about.

To quote Elvis Presley, how about a little less conversation and a little more action.

Don’t simply “tell” us what is wrong with our world, show us.

And here is one better –

Show us what your “change” is doing to improve this situation that you, in your “peace, love and drugs” -world so self-righteously perceive and then so unjustly force on the rest of us living here on planet earth.

Just simply show us the truth that you keep telling us that you are telling.

Let us decide how we are going to deal with it.

As to your licorice-coated hooks and lures – I’m spitting them out.

Your boat just don’t float this old country boy, and personally, I don’t think there is a one of us who wants to become sushi for one of our President’s gala events.

It is like being on a fishing expedition with people who nothing about fish, lakes, boats, rods, reels or tackle – but they know everything about what consitutes positive change.

I think it is time land-lovin’, tree-huggin’ hippies stick to the shore.

About precipii

An aged anti-hippie, ...


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